The Postman Always Rings Twice -- A Week by George Ziemann -- April 12, 2010 There's this thing out there called the Constitution that sort of spells out what the original idea of how to run America looked like. Article 1, Section 8 lists what Congress has the power to do. As a joke, the Defense Dept. would later make Section 8 of the military's code describe people unfit for duty, but that's not important right now. Among the long list of Congress' powers are: To provide for the Punishment of counterfeiting the Securities and current Coin of the United States; To establish Post Offices and post Roads; To promote the Progress of Science and useful Arts, by securing for limited Times to Authors and Inventors the exclusive Right to their respective Writings and Discoveries; These three items appear before they got to "declare War," "raise and support Armies" or "provide and maintain a Navy," which might give the impression that it was more important. On the other hand, they wrote this thing with a quill pen, so it may just mean that they added things to the list in the order they thought of them. Thinking about it, that almost reinforces the idea they listed them in order of importance. Regardless, right there between punishing counterfeiters and copyright is having roads and a post office. But there's a problem with the Post Office part now. It's not making any money. The General Accounting Office (GAO) just audited the Postal Service and declared it to be "Not Viable," which is pretty much the same label everyone put on the banking system a year or two ago. We bailed out the banks (private enterprise), but the GAO says it's time to gut the post office. They're thinking about retirement incentives, closing post offices, and reducing the number of days mail is delivered. If you follow the link and read the comments there, it becomes obvious that after 234 years (give or take a few months), this has something to do with Obama and health care. These are likely the same people who were saying a couple of weeks ago that the Civil War had nothing to do with slavery. There's another point that I agree with, but before we get there, it's good to take note of the fact that while Congress may "have the power" to do something, it doesn't say that they are required to. Anyone who's ever watched lawyers quibble over a semicolon knows that these are two very, very different things. It also doesn't say they have to keep post offices open once they establish them. Doesn't even require people to deliver mail or even suggest that they hire a janitor. Putting that aside, the real question is, why does the USPS have to turn a profit? The Defense Dept. doesn't make a profit, and they're sucking money as fast as it can be shoveled down the hole. Does the public library make a profit? Schools? The FDA? FCC? Postal service is something that we all use, all benefit from, does its job in a timely manner and it's the one government service that has to make money? If we're that bad off (and apparently we are), I think there are a lot of other cost-trimming areas that we could use to get the money to bail out the Postal Service. Secret Service -- Oh, we still need to protect the people in charge, but what about the ex-presidents? Are Carter, Clinton and Bush under any immediate threat? Does anyone even care much about them any more? I'm betting Nancy Reagan and Betty Ford still have agents camped out on their property, watching their every move. Does they even want them any more? We won't save a lot there, but every little bit helps. Ex-Presidential Pay -- It takes about a billion dollars to get elected President of the United States, a job that pays a quarter million a year. These people are obviously not hurting for money. But there are only three of them, unless the wives continue to collect it after their husbands have died, in which case that still is only 5 people. They get paid whatever current Cabinet members earn. Again, not a huge savings. Military -- The same line of Article 1 Section 8 that says Congress has the power to form an army also says they're only allowed to fund it for two years at a time. This is our biggest expense, mostly because it is so far away from the original idea. It took a long time to screw things up so bad, so fixing it won't be instantaneous. Step 1 -- Break the current setup (and its budget) into two distinct parts -- Dept. of Defense (DOD) and Dept. of War (DOW). Step 2 -- All of the military is under the jurisidiction of the DOD. They are subject to being temporarily transferred to the DOW as needed to conduct wars outside the borders of the United States. The National Guard and Coast Guard are exceptions and cannot be deployed to foreign action. Since the Marines are always the first into battle and rarely defend U.S. soil, they are designated as part of the War Department to ensure that there is adequate personnel available without requiring special authorization. Step 3 -- The National Guard comes home immediately. Cha-ching! Afghanistan -- The Special Forces and the CIA hide out, wait until bin Laden (if he's even still alive) thinks the coast is clear and decides to finally step outside for a breath of fresh air. Everyone else comes home. Cha-ching! Iraq -- We know Iraq had nothing to do with 9/11. We're over there trying to change their culture and force democracy on them, whether they want it or not. We had no legitimate reason to go there in the first place, which our leaders at the time were fully aware of. But there's enough oil there to keep our 18 mpg vehicles on the road for a few more decades, maybe longer. We're all now well-aware this is the real reason we invaded Iraq. Why not drop the charade, change the military objective to "protect the oil fields," reducing the American forces there to 2-3 times as many people as we need to establish a secure perimeter and defend it? The other 80,000 or so come home. Cha-ching! The Iraqis get to figure out what they want for themselves, we pay them for the oil, no one else will try to come in and take over the country to get at the petroleum resources. We won't just drop our guns and pretend we were just normal people that just happened to be hanging around -- like the Republican Guard did. Fewer casualties from IEDs (improvised explosive devices) because our team stays within the perimeter, using helicopters or an airstrip to get personnel in and out. Oil retreats to a reasonable price; OPEC follows and increases production just to compete; the entire world benefits. That would pay for the Postal Service, health care, shore up Social Security and probably start reducing the deficit.

Related Content GAO: Postal Service 'Not Viable' -- Washington Post